Mary over at the Ethiopia Adoption Blog recently wrote a post about encouraging empathy in children, and it touched very close to home for me. Ella has begun testing limits and pushing boundaries at an amazing pace. Honestly, in the past week she must have had a little light bulb go off in her head that brought all kinds of new questions with it.

The reason I was so glad to read Mary’s post was because; of course, I want Ella to be an empathetic child who grows into an empathetic adult, and I am seeing positive signs of growth as she goes through this new stage. Her main testing limit trick of choice has become hitting. I have to work VERY hard not to laugh because she is just the cutest thing ever and I can just see the wheels turning in her little head. When something does not go as she wishes or she does not get something that she demands, she has started going to the nearest adult and hitting them on the leg. As she hits she looks straight up at them (always me, my husband or my mom,) with eyes just waiting to see what will happen next.

Ninety five percent of the time, when we respond with an “Ow,” “It’s not okay to hit,” or “No,” she instantly wraps her arms around her victim’s legs and sobs. When she doesn’t respond, we respond verbally and walk away. When she realizes that her playmate has left, she relents and apologizes with her sweet little hug. I don’t know if we’re doing the right thing at all, but it does seem like she is starting to understand that her actions have consequences and she doesn’t like seeing her parents upset. As frustrating of a stage as this is, I hope that the empathetic signs that we’re seeing are true and lasting.

More Reading:
Love Thursday - On Friday (another story of toddlerhood)
Not a Baby Anymore
Toddler Adoption