When a woman gives birth to a baby, she often will remark that she was able to forget the pain of pregnancy and labor as soon as she saw her baby’s face. Many say that this is how women go on to birth more than one child. For us, it’s different, but similar at the same time.

Our first days in Viet Nam with Ella, and even more so, the first weeks at home, seem surreal. I’m not quite sure how we got through it, but I think a large part was not being completely aware of how hard it was at the time. The adjustment to parenthood was difficult and we were completely in survival mode for quite awhile. Now that we’ve settled in and have somewhat of a handle on this parenthood thing, I’m almost shocked and surprised by my memories of those early days.

Although I remember the screaming and crying (mine mostly) because she wouldn’t sleep; the memory seems surreal. Just like the mom who forgets the pain of pushing when she sees her baby’s face, I have forgotten those days. Not literally, but I have forgotten enough to rarely think of them. Now that my daughter has blossomed into a giggling, happy toddler who loves her mommy, I have managed to forget the frantic nights spent blankly, desperately clinging to my husband as we just shook our heads because we just didn’t know what to do.

And now that I know that parenting most certainly does improve with time, I understand how people can add more children to their families. If I were to judge child raising based solely on those first sleep deprived weeks with a scared baby who was only trying to figure out what was going on in her life, I would call myself and all parents crazy. Now that those times are behind us (of course we still have struggles, but they are much easier to handle now that we know each other better,) I am much more optimistic and can start to look forward to the future.



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