This week I’m going to take some time and go through the step by step process of adopting a child from Viet Nam. The first step is the one of making the decision to adopt. Deciding to adopt a child is a completely personal decision, and one that adoptive parents come to from many different places. Just as having a biological child is a huge decision, deciding to adopt a child requires (and deserves) a great deal of thought and consideration. Raising a child is a life changing experience (for you and the child) and I wish all parents (biological included) took the time that we adoptive parents take to think about their road to parenthood.

Families who come into the adoption world after infertility need to grieve their own loss; the loss of a biological child. Adoptive parents know that adoption is certainly not second best, but it may take some time to get over the fact that the quest for a biological child has ended and the quest for a child who you may never have considered is beginning.

Coming to adoption after the loss of a child requires a great deal of sensitivity and honesty. Adoption is not a quick fix, and it will not heal wounds left by a child who passed away. However, through the grieving and mourning period, it can become clear that adopting a child is the next step to build one’s family. I highly recommend talking with a counselor or therapist if you have experienced loss and/or infertility and are considering adoption. They can help you work through unresolved issues and move into the future on a clearer path.

Although we’re not talked about very much, there are many families who make a conscious decision to adopt instead of conceive a child. Many people remember knowing as a child that they would someday adopt a child and are now fulfilling their dream. Even if adopting is something you've always known you would do, it's still a huge decision and one that requires a great deal of thought.

Regardless of what first put the idea of adoption in your head, your decision will open many doors. Doors to children, a family, new cultures and new people. Deciding to adopt is the first step…next we will look into making the decision to adopt from Viet Nam.

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More Reading:
Adoption is Life Changing
Deciding to Adopt a Child, What You Have to Offer
Deciding to Adopt, Dealing with Unsupportive People